Why Terence is the cook...

In attempting to eat better I decided to make some eggs and turkey bacon for breakfast this morning (aka 6pm because I am working the overnight shift).

First I put 2 strips of slimy bacon on the microwave tray, EWW.

Cook that for 2 minutes, then realize I need to get the eggs going. So I turn the burner on high (because my bacon is almost done, I have to cook quickly) and I drop 2 eggs in the pan.

Immediately they start browning and getting all gross and the microwave beeps, bacon is done!

So I furiously start stirring the eggs and turn the heat down, meanwhile our fire alarm starts going off, not just the one by the kitchen but the one in the family room too. CRAP!

So I stop stirring the eggs and get a pan to start fanning the fire alarm, it stops. Back to the gross eggs, they are done burning by now.

I get out a plate, get the bacon, wait the bacon is all slimy still (EWW again), so back in the microwave. Now my burned eggs are getting cold, DING, finally bacon is done again.

So for breakfast: cold burned eggs and 2 pieces of bacon that accidentally stuck together, Great!

So if ever you have a question as to why Terence is the cook, this is it. If you think this is the only time this has happened, no, a few months ago I started a fire in the kitchen and we had to leave the apartment it was so smoky!